The other night I heard a friend say “Yeah, but God would want…”
So many times we put our ‘wants’ into our opinion of what God wants for us. God doesn’t want us to suffer, he wants us to prosper, but his definition of suffering and prospering may differ from ours!
So often we come to a conclusion of what God wants for our lives without comparing it to God’s word. And because of the situation I am in, I hear comments like this often. “God doesn’t want you to be single your whole life”, “God wants you to be happy”, “God doesn’t want you to suffer”…
Singleness isn’t a bad thing! Singleness gives you time with God, time to focus on your relationship with him without interruption and time to hear his voice and walk in the direction he is setting before you.
An unmarried woman or a virgin is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.
1 Corinthians 7:34
Yes, I have been married before. Yes, sex is wonderful. Yes, I can’t wait to be married again. But God has called me to wait for my husband to return to me, however long that takes. God doesn’t ask you to do things that he won’t provide the strength to endure. Through God, I am satisfied with where I am in life. Through him, I am content being single.
If I was trying to do this on my own strength, it would be impossible. When I focus on the world’s definition of happiness in this part of my life, I get antsy. I want a man to put his arms around me, I want to be kissed again, I want to go on a date, I want to hear how beautiful he thinks I am. But when I pray for strength to help me through this point of my life, God provides in a way I never, ever thought was possible.
Yes, I believe that I am called to a married life. I believe that God will allow this to happen and that my husband and I will have such a testimony and such a powerful relationship that it will only bring God glory. The ‘how’ is what I don’t know right now. But it’s not my job to know the ‘how’, it’s my job to know obey God’s instructions. I can’t wait for that day where I look back and see the ‘how’! The day where I can say “Hey satan, look at this! What you meant as a curse, God has turned into a blessing! You are crushed beneath our feet!!”
If you look at what the disciples had to go through to witness and to live their lives to glorify Christ…I think I have a pretty cushy life. “Suffering” is the last word I would use to describe it.
Yes, I’m living a single life. Yes, I am living off of a limited pay-cheque. But I have never felt so full of life! I have never felt so close to God, so in-tune with my purpose in life or so at peace.
Sure, there are bad days where I wish I was “normal”. Where I wish that I could just live life and not worry about being accountable to God (wait, stop…is that what it is to be ‘normal’?!…yikes!). But I believe so strongly that God has called me to this path that I know I can’t give up on it. Not only am I fully confident that God has told me to live this life for him, but in this lifestyle I have heard from him so frequently and so obviously that I just wouldn’t and couldn’t give up on that.
Consider who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.
If I keep my eyes on Jesus, everything else fades into the background. If I focus on him and his biblical call to my life, everything else is just a slight detail. Forget my marriage for a second, forget my husband for a moment…God’s call to every Christian’s life is to live fully for him. When I get to the Pearly Gates God isn’t going to ask me “So Katie, were you married?” or “When was the last time you had sex?” He’s going to ask me what I did to advance the Kingdom of Heaven and what fruit I have to show for it, he’s going to ask what treasured I stored up for Heaven, not Earth.
There is always a purpose to the suffering that God asks of us. He won’t ask us to do anything that he won’t help us through and when we look back and realize that the God of the universe was right beside us the entire time, speaking to us and holding our hand, I believe that we won’t consider what we went through as suffering. We’ll realize the miracle of experiencing our God through it all made it worth it.
I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you… Many are the woes of the wicked, but the Lord’s unfailing love surrounds the man who trusts in him.